We went to Vegas with the intent of spending time w/ his family and breaking the news of my pregnancy to them. But two weeks before our trip, his mom passed away from terminal cancer. 😓And a few days before, I lost our baby. 😢 Needless to say, this has been a rough month for us. Especially for him. I can't imagine losing my mom, as much as she can drive me nuts. Its just too painful to think about. Vegas was nice. We got to spend a lot of time with his sister's family and sweet lil' Aunt who made food for all of us. I just adored her. 😊 Tiffany and her husband were great and their house full of lovely children made me hopeful, but also a little sad for our loss. Like we really wanted that baby. And I still cry a lot thinking about how it's gone now. I'm scared it will happen again.
I'm depressed. The loss has been palpable. I need to exercise and eat healthy and to remain hopeful. And these next 5 weeks without my fiance will be difficult. He is my rock. Yeah, I get to see his sweet smile every day on video chat, but nothing beats his skin on mine and the smell of his neck. Fuck, I love this man. I can face anything w/ him by my side. That is why I am marrying him. I'm so ecstatic that I get to love and care for him until we die.
Austin in frozen. I slipped on ice and hurt my ankle. Blah. I am stoked to be back at work tomorrow and that being said, I must rest. 💜
No comments:
Post a Comment